Friday, November 14, 2008

6.5 million people nationwide live in your world, too.,8599,1724522,00.html

You're not alone, Allie.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Margaret put beans in my ears

You know that story about the boy whose mom tells him never, ever, to go into the kitchen, take a chair and put it next to the counter, climb up onto the counter, reach to the back of the top shelf, take down a jar of dried beans and put the beans in his ears? The boy would never have thought of it on his own, but once it's been put into his mind like that, what's the first thing he does next time his mom leaves the room? Of course -- he goes into the kitchen, takes a chair and puts it next to the counter, climb up onto the counter, reaches to the back of the top shelf, takes down a jar of dried beans and puts the beans in his ears.

Well, yesterday I was running really late to work and barely missed the bus to the metro. I could have just driven in to work, but I didn't want to pay $15 to park downtown. (Yeah, you heard me right. $15.) Anyway, I decided to drive and park as close to the metro as I could and walk the rest of the way there.

As I was parking my car, I remembered Margaret's awesome adventure and made a mental note, "I MUST remember to drive my car home from this spot tonight and not just take the bus."

This morning I was getting ready for work and thinking, as I do many mornings, about the pros and cons of driving vs. metroing to work. And I remembered parking my car the previous morning, but couldn't remember driving it home. In fact, I couldn't remember getting home at all, whether on the bus, walking, driving -- no memory at all of how I got home last night. (And I don't drink or do drugs so that's kind of unusual for me.)

I looked out the window -- no car. I racked my brain. What was I doing last night?

Oh yeah! I met up with Dawn and Susan for dinner and visiting teaching right after work, and Susan gave us both a ride home! So that means my car is ... still parked on Upland Street about a ten minute walk from the metro. (Twenty minute walk from my house.) Awesome.

Would this still have happened if I hadn't read Margaret's detailed account of forgetting to drive her car home? We'll never know.

OK, fine, it probably still would have happened.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

A verbatim text message exchange between Matt and me

(after one or two messages back and forth)

me: I just walked into a pole while texting you.
Matt: Ha. Welcome to your world.

Saturday, November 8, 2008

It. Just. Keeps. Getting. Better.

So I did the classic "drive to work and take the bus home" a couple of weeks ago. But it really is SO much better than that. Here goes:

So I opened my blinds the next morning and panicked for a minute when I didn't see my car, and then realized that sure enough, I had been running late the morning before and missed my bus and drove to campus and parked at the Institute building. And then forgot, and took the bus home from campus. That was Dumb Moment #1.

But wait, there's more!

So since it was Friday that next day, I didn't have class, and just had to be on campus at 12 noon to film some interviews for work. And since there is one bus during rush hour and another in the middle of the day that runs less frequently (every hour instead of every half hour), I had to check the bus schedule to make sure I'd catch the bus in time to be at my building on time. No problem - there was one that would get me there about 45 minutes early. So I went out to my usual bus stop to wait. And the bus didn't come. And then a bus came on the other side of the street, going the other direction, which I had never seen happen before. (Wait for it...) Yes, there is a bus stop on the other side of the street, but I had never before been waiting at one stop and seen a bus going the other direction at the same time. Weird, but there's a first time for everything.

And my bus still didn't come.

And then I saw a bus go by the head of my street, and I thought, "Phew! That's my bus, it's just a little late, and it's running the other part of the loop and will come back down here." (Wait for it...)

But it didn't come.

But since I had SEEN that bus go by, across the top of the street, I KNEW there was a bus out there somewhere, running this route, so I waited. And waited. And waited.

And finally it occurred to me that I had a copy of the bus schedule in my bag. And sure enough, in the middle of the day, the bus does my part of the route BACKWARDS, so that bus that had come to the stop across the street? That was my bus. And the bus that, a few minutes later went past the head of my street? That was my bus. And the bus that I didn't see, but that went down another street on the other side of my apt complex, that I could have caught if I had realized my mistake and RUN? That was my bus, too. Dumb moment #2!

Now ordinarily, not that big of a deal to miss the bus - I could just drive. But wait - I pulled that trick yesterday, and remember Dumb Moment #1? Yup, my car was ALREADY ON CAMPUS!!

So I went back to my apartment, and in the 15 minutes before I had to leave to catch the bus going the right direction, I emailed the guy filming the interviews, hoping against hope that the person we were filming at noon had fallen through, since we hadn't 100% confirmed that time. No such luck - we were on, and I was going to be 15 minutes late for a 20 minute interview. I'm awesome. So I emailed him my pathetic "I can read, just not bus schedules" excuse, and went to catch the bus.

But wait, there's more!

The interviews turned out ok, the rest of the day went ok, and then it was time to go home. I was determined not to leave my car parked at the Institute building ANOTHER night, so I went to catch a bus that would save me the 15 minute walk to the Institute building. At the bus stop I started chatting with this nice lady, and when we were on the bus, exchanging phone numbers so that she could come to church with me on Sunday (I called her and she didn't call me back), yup, you guessed it - I missed the stop that I should have gotten off at for the Institute building. And not only did I miss the stop, but that was the last stop before a "no stop" zone, so I had to ride the bus for a little while before I could get off, and then I'd have to figure out how to get BACK to my car. Dumb Moment #3.

I got off at the next stop, and it just so happened that there was a bus coming the other direction right then, so I hustled across the street, got on that bus, got off at the right stop, and walked the one block to the Institute building, only to find...

...that my car was right there where I had left it. Phew.

Friday, November 7, 2008

If ye are prepared...

So I'm a grad student, right? And we have these big exams at the end of our second year of classes, and a big reading list to prepare for the exams. So the four of us who started the program this semester get together every two weeks to discuss one of the books on the reading list. And we had a meeting today, and the last couple of weeks have been so crazy that as of Wednesday I hadn't done my reading yet - eep!

And this time we decided that instead of us all attempting to read the whole book, we'd each be responsible for writing up an outline for certain chapters that we'd then share with the rest of the group. So that meant that if I didn't do my reading I'd really be letting down my whole group, since they were expecting me to fill them in on the parts that I had been assigned - double eep!

So on Wednesday I went to the library, in a big rush, and scanned the pages that I was supposed to read for today, and I was bummed because I thought this one section was 100 pages and it was actually 150, but with all my other work I didn't even touch the reading by the time I fell into bed last night, so I got up at 4am today to at least outline the chapters and read the intros and conclusions. And after a group meeting this morning for another class and the interview I had to film for work, I sat down and did some more frantic reading and outlining so that I would at least have SOMETHING to share with my group this afternoon.

And I quickly typed all the headings from all the chapters, and read the intros and conclusions to a couple of the chapters, and 10 minutes before the meeting started I printed out 4 pages to read on the way to the meeting, and I got through 1 of them and was actually feeling pretty good about things...(I know--that's pathetic. Moving on...)

...until I discovered that I had read the wrong book.

Yeah, I had frantically read and outlined and GOT UP AT FOUR IN THE MORNING to blast through selections from a DIFFERENT really fat reference book, from which we read selected chapters for our LAST group meeting, two weeks ago. In my rush on Wednesday, I'd grabbed, ya know, the familiar-looking fat book off the reference shelf. In my defense, the titles are almost the same, and this book ALSO had 7 sections, and there WAS a section 3, with several chapters whose titles looked familiar, and yes, that one section was 150 pages instead of the 100 I was anticipating, but hey, I never claimed I could do math, so I just figured we'd subtracted wrong when we split up the reading.

Nope. Wrong book.

And one of my group members looked at me and said, "Aren't YOU the one who sends the email out to everyone about what book we are reading?"



Why yes, yes I am.

Monday, June 2, 2008

Apparently I have a price attached...

Yeah, so I bought some new pants on Saturday, and while I was talking to someone at work today I went to put my hands into the back pockets, and couldn't, because they were still sewn shut. So why did it feel like there was a rectangular piece of paper INSIDE the sewn-shut pocket??

Oh, it's not inside the POCKET - it's inside the PANTS...

Yup. Welcome to my pants. Next time remove ALL tags before wearing...

Monday, April 21, 2008

Liquid Assets

I seem to be having lots of little issues lately. If something could or might go a little wrong- it does. I am pretty sure nobody has ever done what I did today. I was at the bank depositing a couple checks. Josh was yelling for a booger sucker (yes- he has confused what I use to suck snot out of Jake's nose.. with a lollipop) and I was fiddling to hurry and fill out the deposit slip. In between my legs I had one of those big plastic water bottles...kinda looks like the thing banks use to collect what your depositing. I continued to put each check in what I thought was the banks little collector dealy. NO..... I was putting it into the waterbottle, full of water. How dumb I felt when I had to beep the lady to explain why all my checks were sopping wet.

(From my friend Megan)